Is your ex SPYING on you through your home? Singletons reveal their terrifying ordeals with their former partners thanks to Alexa, Ring doorbells, and shared Netflix accounts

With their ability to record and transmit video and audio, there’s no doubt smart devices make our lives more convenient than ever. 

However, they also mean breaking up with someone is much more complex than it once was. 

Our go–to gadgets are leaving us vulnerable to snooping – and in many cases ex–partners are the perpetrators. 

Along with shared logins and apps, the devices mean your ex could be spying on you long after you have split up.

Scarily, they could even be keeping tabs on your location and search history.  

Singletons have revealed their terrifying ordeals with their former partners thanks to the likes of Apple AirTags and Amazon Ring doorbell. 

Meanwhile, one man was left outraged when he discovered a friend of his ex had been using his login for years without his knowledge. 

So is your ex spying on you? Here are the creepy tactics to be on the look out for.  

Ring doorbell

Amazon’s Ring doorbell has a built–in camera that allows you to see a live video feed of what’s happening either side of your front door at any moment.

It lets you keep an eye on your neighbours, the postman, or any suspicious characters lurking outside or even inside your home. 

The accompanying Ring app, which streams the doorbell’s video feed, lets multiple people in a household to see the footage on their own device. 

But this means people have been able to monitor the activities of ex–housemates – even after they’ve moved out.

On the Ring community page, one user asked people for help, saying ‘My ex is in my account’. 

She wrote: ‘I don’t know if he cloned my phone or what but it’s obvious he’s in my ring account somehow.’  

In response, someone informed her that she’d probably given her ex ‘shared user’ access, which can be rescinded. 

Two years ago, British man Jonathan Maybury was found guilty of coercive behaviour after using a Ring doorbell camera to spy on his girlfriend. 

Another man aired suspicions of his wife on Reddit after noticing that the video feed from the doorbell sometimes couldn’t be reached. 

He hinted at some kind of sabotage taking place that might momentarily turn off the feed – perhaps while an unknown person entered and exited the home. 

The man said: ‘Just today, she sent a strangely worded text that piqued my curiosity so I checked into Live View to get that “Ring doorbell cannot be reached” error message for like 10 minutes. 

‘Allegations that I am paranoid while continuing to notice these cues is driving me insane.’ 

Amazon Alexa 

Amazon’s brand of ‘Echo’ smart speakers are fitted with Alexa, the company’s intelligent virtual voice assistant. 

Whenever you directly address Alexa, the technology will listen to and record whatever you say before sending the audio to the cloud. 

People can review and listen back to their Alexa conversation history in your Amazon account – so if your ex is moving out, be sure that they take their Alexa–enabled device with them. 

If they leave the device behind and you continue to use it to talk to Alexa, they could be keeping track of what you say. 

Alternatively, if you ex has moved out they may still have access to your Alexa. 

In 2020, a British woman discovered her ex–partner had been secretly listening to recordings from her Alexa device long after their relationship had ended.

Taking advantage of an Alexa feature called Drop In – which turns multiple Alexa–enabled devices to intercoms – he’d been granted access while they lived together and it had never been revoked. 

By the time she realised what was happening, he had been monitoring her private conversations from another location, using only his phone and her Alexa device.

In another case, London woman Shelby Laidlaw found her abusive ex was snooping on her using a hacked Amazon Alexa smart speaker. 

Amazon has already received criticism for letting staff listen to and transcribe user conversations with Alexa.

An Amazon spokesperson told the Daily Mail: ‘We build easy-to-use controls for our customers, including microphone and camera controls on Echo devices, the ability to review and delete Alexa voice recordings, options to easily revoke shared users from Ring accounts, and Two-Step Verification to increase Amazon account security.

‘We continuously work to enhance support in this important area and remain committed to innovation with privacy and security at the core.’

Apple AirTags 

Another controversial gadget is the AirTag – the little coin–sized tracking device from Apple, which has let creepy men follow women. 

An AirTag user can potentially set the device up on their phone, slip it in someone’s bag or pocket, and get a real–time update of their location on an app called ‘Find My’. 

In 2022, a British woman was in her car when a message popped up on her phone saying that an Apple AirTag had been detected nearby. 

After a search, she found the AirTag under the carpet in the back – put there by her ex–partner when he transferred their child’s car seat from his car to her backseat.

Another woman said she had been tracked without her knowledge for two hours around Disneyland when an AirTag was slipped about her person.

She said she only found out that she was being tracked after two hours because she got a notification from the Find My app. 

According to a 2022 investigation by Vice, 150 police reports from dozens of US police departments had involved AirTags over an eight–month period.

Of the 150 reports, 50 cases involved women who’d started getting notifications that their whereabouts were being tracked by an AirTag they didn’t own.

iPhone 

Apple’s Find My app also lets people track other Apple devices such as iPhones, which due to their ubiquity are tied even more tightly to people’s location.

One Reddit user reached out for advice after discovering a female friend was ‘being stalked by her ex through her iPhone’ using the app.

It appeared that the ex had her iPhone linked to his Find My, which is linked to an Apple ID. 

The user posted: ‘So my friend recently got divorced, now the thing is, the iPhone 13 she has was bought by her ex, so we believe he is currently using the find my iPhone feature to track her location.

‘I think the best option would be to just buy a new iPhone and change her passwords on everything, but now i am wondering if she should also be creating a new apple id or is changing the password enough, considering he currently has access to it?’

Other users advised that she disable all app tracking and location services on her iPhone. 

Apple has been contacted for comment. 

Netflix 

On Netflix, a single account can host multiple ‘profiles’, each named and curated for a particular person, letting couples share a Netflix account whether or not they’re living in a different household.

Unfortunately, in the event of a split, deleting an ex’s profile is often a job that gets forgotten – and as a result, people can potentially keep track of their ex’s Netflix habits. 

Many people aren’t aware that Netflix records not only what each profile has been watching but what date it was watched.

This data – found under ‘viewing activity’ – reveals patterns that could suggest to an ex–boyfriend, for example, when their ex–girlfriend is likely to be at home snuggled up on the sofa watching TV. 

According to one TikTok user, an ex used his Netflix login for three months after they broke up then called him ‘stingy’ when he changed the password. 

Another man was left outraged when he discovered a friend of his ex had been using his login for years without his knowledge. 

Yet another revealed how his brother’s ex-girlfriend had been secretly logging into his Netflix by cunningly disguising her account as ‘settings’.  

One Reddit user recently shared his concerns over his girlfriend using the same account as her ex living in another household. 

He wrote: ‘According to her, it’s totally harmless, they don’t talk, they just still use the same login.

‘I told her I’m not comfortable with that. I think it’s weird to stay digitally tied to someone you used to date, especially when you’re in a new relationship. 

‘She rolled her eyes and said I was being petty and immature over ‘a few movies and shows.”

Of course, such an issue is not unique to Netflix, as streaming services like Disney+, Amazon Prime Video and Spotify all allow shared accounts. 

Harry Calder, solicitor at Tees Law, said tech ‘has enabled new ways for people to harass ex–partners by tracking their movements and spying on their digital platforms’.

‘When you part company with your partner, it’s important to break any digital links you may have, such as shared passwords or PINs, or accounts on services such as Spotify or Netflix,’ he said. 

‘If you don’t cut these ties, you’re potentially leaving yourself open to an ex–partner using that digital access to spy on you, or intimidate you in other ways.’